my attempt at a series: Things I Never Thought I’d Say

“Where is the pig, *student*?! GIVE ME THE PIG.”
Yup. I can’t even try to explain that. There is no explanation besides…ridiculous. RIDICULOUS.
Also- I’m really good (like, a pro) at taking things from kids. Seriously, I’m SO good that a kid tried to steal from my desk when I was gone…that’s how much stuff I have of his. I have his Nintendo DS, 2 Bakugan toys, 4 Beyblade spinners (I don’t really know what they are either), a trading card and a GameCube disc. Yup. 
So, my girl has a Justin Bieber watch. What?! Who doesn’t love the Biebs?! The boys in my class, that’s who. Anyhow, my girl is playing with her brand-spanking-new-pink-plastic-Justin-Bieber watch and I tell her that if she plays with it again, it’s mine. Well, needless to say, that happened. She was playing at her desk & I took it. You have to know, my favorite part of taking things (like her necklace full of Silly Bandz that I took in September), is gloating that I own it…so I walk away going, “Sweet! New watch! Nothin’ like a little Biebs on my wrist!” Really? As these words are coming out of my mouth I’m thinking, “Biebs on your wrist, Jessica? You’re nuts.”
The kids loved it. What the heck. They may make me crazy, but at least they laugh at my crazy. 
P.S. For anyone who cares (I know you all are on the edges of your metaphorical seats), I have some posts of fun things we’ve been doing lately. I’m pretty pumped. Hopefully, there are lots of changes in my/our life/lives coming up soon! Hooray!

things i never expected to say…

So- I’m going to try to start a “series” on this blog. I mean, who am I kidding? I will have a difficult time keeping up any kind of “series” and sometimes my kids give me no material. Today, however? Yes. 


Installment #1 of “Things I Never Thought Would Come Out of My Mouth”

“SERIOUSLY?! YOU’RE TELLING ME YOU JUST TIED YOURSELF TO A BOOK CART?!?!?!


And no, there is no preface. We started to leave for the day and my line was stuck because a child had tied himself to the book cart. What. The. Heck. 


Happy Tuesday! 🙂 

cuteness. personified.

Anyone who has mentioned the word j-o-b to me in the last two years has heard how much I L-O-V-E mine. My kids are adorable. Seriously. Freaking. Adorable. I have 8 students this year that I have had in years past. That bond is strong. The additional 13 kids that I have gotten the pleasure of teaching this year are also incredible and never cease to make me smile…well, almost never. 

Today we were discussing Grammar: what you learn to make your writing sound better. Yes, right now we’re focusing on grammar in writing, not in speaking…baby steps. I have used the example of things they say, “Is we going to lunch yet?” Ummm. Yeah. Baby. Steps. 

So today we discussed Questions vs. Statements. I was giving them an example because they were confused with the “being” verbs (He was running. -they said there was no “what” in his sentence…) so I told them, “I am 26.” Immediately one of my girls replied, “But you look young!” Soon backed up by another student, “Really young! You do!” 

Uhhhhh…thanks, guys.  

So also,  today I told my kids that my favorite day this week was Saturday. Some of my sweet, intuitive girls knew that it was because my husband is coming home so they wrote me cards on their own paper. Things like, “Miss Willis, I hope you have a great day on Saturday. I know you’ve missed him very much…”


and then my favorite one of the day…


“You’re the double best teacher I could ever have.”


See why my j-o-b is so awesome?

Well well…when it rains it pours. That apparently is the case with life events and my blogging. I get behind, I stop blogging, I read books (or don’t) and then it all catches up at once. This is a normal old blog post in case you subscribe in a reader (which I assume you don’t, but it boosts my confidence to dream)…but there’s nothing fun and literary. Not even pictures.
I know. I suck.
Last week was my last week of school. Yes. I cried. 
In fact, that may not even being to describe it. Wednesday went a little like this…get kids settled, FIRE DRILL @ 9:25 (not a drill, actually, a kitchen sensor went off and we had to evacuate…with parents in the building for an awards assembly), rush kids back in the building to start the 9:30 awards assembly, get them seated and realize that my awards are in the wrong order, squat in the floor putting them in the right order, get called up right after that, and get ready to present awards…oh, and I forgot to mention, get an email that leaves me hanging so I’m freaking out until I find out what it’s about…awesome. Have I mentioned patience is not a virtue I possess? 
That brings me to presenting my awards. I love crowds. I also hate crowds. When I have to speak in front of parents/colleagues/administrators, I have a serious fear that I sound/look 12 years old and they think I’m an idiot. So, I start presenting my awards and thank all of my amazing parents/grandparents/students and then I get emotional and my throat closes up and my eyes water. *cue voice in my head* No, Jessica. Not right now. You have to stop looking like a wuss.*
Deep breath. Get it together. 
OK. Keep reading awards…finish assembly. Victory?
No. We got back to the classroom where I presented superlative-type awards based on talents that may not be academic/data-based. I had amazing kids (in case you didn’t notice) who were silly, creative, artistic, athletic, sensitive, caring, and full of knowledge. I gave awards accordingly. So…all of the parents come in and stand near their child or in the back of the room. The kids are eager to know what other awards they’re getting (they’d already received at least 2) and then the tears pour (yes, I used bold, italic, and underline–it was that bad) down my face. I tried to thank them for sharing their kids. I tried to talk about how great their kids were and how much I love them. I lost the battle. I actually asked them to give me a second because (oh yeah, my contacts completely disintegrated and I was wearing my glasses) I couldn’t read the names/titles on the certificates. 
Pathetic.
To make things more insane…my good friend Jess called me asking if I had a place to stay because she needed to move out of her current housing and find a place until August 1st. Now, many of you may not know Jess but, she’s awesome so it is super exciting to have her staying with me for 6 weeks. Many of you may not know me well but, I’m super broke, so the extra money helps. Yeah, yeah. I’m not a good enough person to let people stay rent free. Also, Jess is too wonderful not to offer. I tell ya, she rocks. Anyway, I’ve known Jess for years and it’s super fun  to have someone else around. The cats LOVE it. Seriously, I’ll take pictures of Cricket being INSANE because he loves having the attention of someone new. It’s hilarious.
Also, my dear friend Brice and his lovely girlfriend, Emily were coming to stay for a wedding they were going to this past weekend…and I got way behind when packing up for the school year so I had to stay and pack things (still not finished) in my classroom that I hadn’t thought I would pack. So…in 3 days I rearranged my shed, cleared out the guest room (don’t look in my office), cleaned the bathroom, moved furniture, and packed up almost all of my classroom. Then I had 3 new people in my house (which was super fun), still had a boyfriend with poison ivy (finally clearing up after more than a week, poor guy– did I mention my yard looks good?), and- oh right- took him home to meet my entire family. Then my stomach started killing me like it hasn’t done in two months. As I drove back from Spotsylvania last night I casually mentioned to him that, oh yeah, my doctor said I shouldn’t stress because it might flare up my stomach. Oops. 
Super upsides of the weekend: amazing company, a great new roommate, healing poison ivy, and getting to see two of my ADORABLE girls in a dance/gymnastics recital that they ROCKED! 🙂
Anyway, today was the first day of summer. I went to two sessions that will take care of some professional development guilt that I had and tomorrow I’m going to pack the rest of my room. Wednesday? Beach? Obviously. 

how is my favorite Diegos doing?

I have a student whose name is Diego.  He is the one who missed me all the way from his table about a month ago. Diego is adorable, very cute, and sometimes a little distracted from what’s going on. For example, we’ll be moving in line and he will be looking around at the pictures on the wall so I have to say, “Go Diego, Go!” I do apologize for my blatant misuse of his name. However, when he brings his lunchbox with the cartoon character Diego on it, I can’t help but get caught up in the catchphrase!

Anyhow, Diego has a little brother who is in Kindergarten and I happen to adore some of the Kindergarteners in his class. I have a friend named Galileo, a friend named Alexandra, and a new friend named Ivan. Ivan constantly says to me, “Hey, you’re Diego’s teacher.” So, today my Kindergarten friends were walking in from recess with their class. I looked at them and said, “Hi! How is my favorite Kindergarten class doing?!”, to which Ivan replied, “How is my favorite Diegos doing?”

Excellent question, friend. I don’t know what it means, but if I find some Diegos, I will most certainly tell you how is they doing.

funny things kids say…

Reading tests are, by far, the funniest experiences of my life. Most of the time, my kids try to be funny. They say clever things…scream out funny words…or make silly faces. However, during a reading test, they’re trying their hardest to be serious…and if they have trouble reading, they come up with good good stuff.

Today’s reading test moment of the day…”Kevin’s other brother used the wagon to make a f-ahhhh…f…aaahhh…f…aaahhh..rrrrrr…fart. Kevin’s other brother used the wagon to make a fart…to make a fart…to make a FORT! Kevin’s other brother used the wagon to make a FORT!”

Might I just add…the lovely student had NO idea they had said fart about 6 times…so I was left to stifle laughter…and exhilarated when they finally came up with fort. 🙂 I love my kids.

i am forgetful.

I wanted to share two things about my breed of crazy: #1- I love…let me repeat…LOVE my students this year so much that I had a dream this weekend that they were in 5th grade and I was still their teacher (yet somehow in present-day) and I was writing them all letters at the end of the year telling them about the people I knew they were and who they could be…how proud I was of them, etc. Anyway, I ended up sobbing because I loved them, threatening them if they didn’t email me throughout middle and high school, and waking myself up because I was so emotional. Then I felt even more guilty for taking off Friday. Personal days and I just can’t work. I have guilt like the Catholic Church (no offense, Catholics, just a cliche).

#2- I love to share stories even if EVERY other teacher in the world has experienced them. So here goes, they’re special-er and cuter because they’re MY kids. 🙂 So I have a student who was gone for 3 weeks because he went to Mexico for a family situation and then had a crappy situation when they got home too. It was really sad and he didn’t deserve to have a crappy month of February. However, it all worked out and he’s back at school and everything’s working out for them. Yay!
Anyhow, he came to my back table to ask me a question the other day because he needed something…or something? I don’t remember the particulars. However, he came back and said, “Hey Ms. Havens…I really missed you.”…and I said, “When, [insert male student name]?”…and he said, “I really missed you when you were over here and I was at my desk working. I just missed you.”

WEFKJAWE;GLKJWE G;LKAJEWF AWEF WHY ARE YOU SO ADORABLE?!

I love my kids. 🙂

xoxo. gossip girl? haha, no. just me. well…there are def. times in my life that nickname would’ve worked, but alas, I’m supposed to be a grown-up now. 😉